She looked at the clock for the nth time. It showed 6.00am. And it was exactly 8 minutes since she last looked at it. She opened the cupboard and took out the saree she would wear for her wedding four hours from now. Holding the saree to her chest and draping it casually, she walked to the mirror. Did she look a bride to be? No, she guessed, a bundle of nerves, yes, but not shy, timid, coy, as one would expect a bride to be. She knew she did not look bad, frankly, she considered herself to be attractive. At 47, she looked at least 15 years younger and those meeting her for the first time were stunned to hear that she had two daughters who were married and that she was already a grandmother.
Sandeep had dropped her home yesterday and seeing her nervous state, he had asked his maid and come and sleep at her house. Her friends had also offered to come around and keep her company. But she had refused. She wanted to relax, do some last minute packing and be in the house she had shared with Rakesh for almost 20 years.
Two of her friends were expected anytime now to lend her moral support, to be with her at the Registrar’s Office. The phone rang and she ran to pick it up.
Yes, Sandeep, I am fine, “ Change my mind”,?? no ways!, Still very much on. See you tomorrow, Yes, we will reach there before 9 am. Bye, Love you too.”she sighed! It was Sandeep, her groom to be
She had put up a brave front in front of him. But inside , she was almost in a state of panic. Her two daughters had told her to” go ahead by all means but don’t expect us”. The elder one Renu had said, Mom, Imagine the scene if I tell my in-laws that my mom is going to get married, You know how very conservative they are”,Typical Tam Brahms”. I shall break the news to them slowly. I will definitely come and meet you later”.
Rinu, the younger one had always been her Papa’s pet. “Frankly Mom, I can’t even imagine anyone in Papa’s place, atleast not yet’.
But, darling it’s been six years since your father died” and four years since I am living alone here. “she had said .
Sorry Mom, We wish you, the very best, but don’t think we will be able to make it. Any ways, to come all the way from London is just not on. We will come down during Christmas Holidays.
It had been six long years since Rakesh had succumbed to blood cancer. He did not survive a delayed diagnosis and complications in bone marrow transplant. All of a sudden she was left alone with two teen aged daughters. At 19 and 16, they were a handful and in between her job, their admission and studies, the years flew by. Renu, at 22, announced she was marrying Ravish, her childhood sweetheart and shifted soon after to Bangalore. Now, three years later she had a one year old son. Rinu, the younger one had also married two years back and was settled in London.
It was exactly, two years before, she had met Sandeep in her office. A Tall attractive man, with a shock of salt pepper hair, he had come to her Travel Agency to cancel his booking for a Europe trip. “Sir, I can reschedule it for the next tour, that way you won’t lose much money” she had offered. ‘I lost my wife” ma’m, and I don’t think we will be taking that trip in the near future”.
“I am extremely sorry, Sir, and I perfectly understand” and before she could help it, she blurted out, “ I lost my husband recently”. I will make the cancellations and inform you, Sir”,she added.
Thus began a friendship, based on mutual empathy. Both had had wonderful marriages and at that point of time did not want anything more than friendship. SLOWLY, the trust grew and blossomed into something more meaningful which they could not put a word to. They had their children to think of. Sandeep had a son in college and she had her two daughters to think of. When the children came to know about their friendship, especially, her daughters, were skeptical. Mom’ Are you sure he is not after your money”? “ What money?” she felt like laughing. After spending a fortune for her husband’s treatment and their two daughters” weddings, she was in no way rich. She said” No dear, I don’t think so, ”he has more than enough of his own”.
Six years was a long time and Sandeep had begun to fill the void in her life. The evenings and nights were particularly lonely. Often she ached for the comforting warmth of a human body beside her. She craved for somebody to talk to , to share a meal with and most of all to share a warm conversation with. Sandeep was everything she could have asked for and more. Sandeep’s son Vivaan had come to accept her. Both knew it was time, they gave a name to their relationship. The day they had announced their plan to get married, Vivaan gave her a hug, and conveyed his acceptance. She told him she would understand if it takes some time for him to accept her, but he had said very wisely, “I am really happy for papa, he is so lonely these days”. She marveled at the way Sandeep had brought him up!
The doorbell rang and with a start she went to open the door. Her two friends stood with garlands and bouquets. “Wow”, they exclaimed! You are positively glowing”. Seeing her forced smile, they asked, ‘”What is the matter? Don’t worry, your daughters will turn around in no time. These days children have become so selfish and are oblivious to their parents’ needs”. Though this sounded true, she couldn’t bear anyone talking about her daughters in that manner. “You know, actually both of them wanted to make it for the wedding. But renu’s son has just recovered from pneumonia, and Rinu’s father in law just had a major heart attack’”.
“Let’s not keep Sandeep waiting!” Chorused her friends and they set off to the Registrar’s Office in her Santro. Along the way, her friends cheered her up with compliments and as the moment drew nearer, her heart thudded heavily threatening to break out from her chest. Tears threatened to burst anytime. She knew she was becoming emotional and needed her daughters at her side. The car slowly drew to a halt at the Registrar’s Office and they got down.
Sandeep along with Vivan was waiting to receive her. The moment he saw her face, he drew her aside, and asked, “everything all right Shona?” and led to his parents who were waiting. She had met them just once before. She touched their feet and received their blessings. They walked to the Registrar’s desk and looked at the clock. There was ten minutes for the “Mahurat”, the auspicious time for the wedding.
Her nerves were acting up, her hands and feet turned cold and she needed to calm herself. She looked around for a chair to sit down and closed her eyes. Drawing a deep breath, she tried meditation. Her only solace, during the last five lonely years! Slowly, the smiling face of the Supreme God Krishna filled her heart. Five years of constant practice had made this visualization possible. And for a second, or a micro second, or was it a nano second, Rakesh’s face smiled at her, as if supporting her decision. After a few moments,she felt a gentle squeeze on her shoulders. Slowly she opened her eyes to look back. Her daughters Renu and Rinu were both standing and smiling through eyes filled with tears. MOM! We are glad we made it today, to be with you and planted a tearful kiss on her cheeks.
“Thank you God! For…… everything”. Silently she sent a million thanks upwards.She walked forward, with her daughters on either side, towards Sandeep, who handed the pen to her. He had his heart in his eyes. She signed, with a smile, MRS.KAVITA SANDEEP NAIR.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
WOMEN'S DAY
Women’s day
The day dawned as yet another day. By now adept at multitasking, I had finished cooking breakfast as well as lunch and by 8.45 am, revised my son’s 8 and 9 times multiplication tables with him,filled the lunch boxes ,kept the clothes ready for the dhobi. Today being Women’s day, all the ladies in our office had decided to wear something nice, I took out a new dress and matching accessories. It was one of those days, when you felt special and decide to do something about it! Of course, hubby dear had totally forgotten about it and to add insult to the injury, my son too had forgotten about it.
Soon I reached the station to catch my regular local.Exchanging greetings with my "train friends", I reached the office . As soon as I entered the office, the white board caught our attention, where the “thought for the day” was dedicated to women. Surprise! Somebody had taken pains to dedicate us the “thought for the day”. It said something nice about women and the perfect ways in which they adapted to their various roles.
The men in the office had a mischievous (mysterious look (??) about their faces, as they wished us “Happy Women’s day”! in chorus. In our office of about 100 staff, 65 were men and 35 were women. At 11 we were asked to assemble in the conference room upstairs. Wondering aloud what the occasion was, little did we know what was in store for us. There the men of the office had organized a special function where each of us were welcomed with a red rose. This was followed by a few speeches where one guy wondered aloud that he couldn’t imagine an office where there would not be any ladies. It would all be black, white and grey!”He said. This guy always appreciated a lady about her good dress sense, of course, without going overboard. Another one said that he was praying that in these days of “Ladies special”trains, Ladies Special Police Station, that they would not think of a Ladies Special Office. “What would become of us??” he wondered! This drew a loud round of applause. There were some emotional speeches too when a guy recalled how his mother had raised him singlehandedly after being widowed in the early years of marriage. More Surprise! Delicious snacks and tea followed and they all were eager to know how we had liked the surprise.
Well, what to say about these men?? Though at times they irritate you with their chauvinistic ways, today’s gesture would have melted the heart of a diehard feminist including me). Thank you, my friends for the lovely surprise and the thought behind it.WE RECIPROCATE THE SENTIMENTS AND WE DO ADORE BEING APPRECIATED! WE OWE YOU ONE!!!
The day dawned as yet another day. By now adept at multitasking, I had finished cooking breakfast as well as lunch and by 8.45 am, revised my son’s 8 and 9 times multiplication tables with him,filled the lunch boxes ,kept the clothes ready for the dhobi. Today being Women’s day, all the ladies in our office had decided to wear something nice, I took out a new dress and matching accessories. It was one of those days, when you felt special and decide to do something about it! Of course, hubby dear had totally forgotten about it and to add insult to the injury, my son too had forgotten about it.
Soon I reached the station to catch my regular local.Exchanging greetings with my "train friends", I reached the office . As soon as I entered the office, the white board caught our attention, where the “thought for the day” was dedicated to women. Surprise! Somebody had taken pains to dedicate us the “thought for the day”. It said something nice about women and the perfect ways in which they adapted to their various roles.
The men in the office had a mischievous (mysterious look (??) about their faces, as they wished us “Happy Women’s day”! in chorus. In our office of about 100 staff, 65 were men and 35 were women. At 11 we were asked to assemble in the conference room upstairs. Wondering aloud what the occasion was, little did we know what was in store for us. There the men of the office had organized a special function where each of us were welcomed with a red rose. This was followed by a few speeches where one guy wondered aloud that he couldn’t imagine an office where there would not be any ladies. It would all be black, white and grey!”He said. This guy always appreciated a lady about her good dress sense, of course, without going overboard. Another one said that he was praying that in these days of “Ladies special”trains, Ladies Special Police Station, that they would not think of a Ladies Special Office. “What would become of us??” he wondered! This drew a loud round of applause. There were some emotional speeches too when a guy recalled how his mother had raised him singlehandedly after being widowed in the early years of marriage. More Surprise! Delicious snacks and tea followed and they all were eager to know how we had liked the surprise.
Well, what to say about these men?? Though at times they irritate you with their chauvinistic ways, today’s gesture would have melted the heart of a diehard feminist including me). Thank you, my friends for the lovely surprise and the thought behind it.WE RECIPROCATE THE SENTIMENTS AND WE DO ADORE BEING APPRECIATED! WE OWE YOU ONE!!!
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Relaxation - What's your style??
Ways to Relax – What is your style??
Recently, a dear of friend of mine, who conducts corporate training sessions on "Happiness at work", Stress Management, Conflict Resolution" etc called me to find out how i was. "Long time, not even a text message from you"? He asked. "Been too busy, I suppose", I blurted out. "Listen, he said, Do me a favour? I have an assignment for you and I need the information real quick. The assignment was to find out from about 100 people how they relaxed and the deadline was “Yesterday”. Soon, I started ringing up my friends, relatives and even acquaintances. Some of them were surprised, but when I said it was for a cause, they joined enthusiastically. First was my friend “Micheal, who said ”Me, I have a set of photos, mainly of my family and child and Mount Mary which are very close to my heart. Whenever I am tense or worked up, I take out this small album, which I always carry and spend around 5 minutes reminiscing. I definitely feel better”:. “That’s nice n simple” I thought. The next friend said “You know, I used to get flustered very easily earlier”. Now a days, When I get upset about something in the office, I take a deep breath, go to the wash room, wash my face and freshen my lipstick.” I feel better”. The answers ranged from punching a boxing bag , listening to music, go for a long walk , gymming, read a romantic novel, listen to old hindi songs, give in to craving and eat a large pastry, singing, playing a musical instrument, cooking a complicated dish, like Puran Poli, Call up an old friend and talk for some time, cuddling a baby – the positive vibes are instant” – I was told. My niece, a vivacious teen said- “ I cry my heart out” – But I do feel better”. My nephew, not to be left out, said “ When I am upset about bad marks, I go and play for a while with my friends – after that I don’t feel so bad. The list was endless, Surprisingly , most of them had their own way to unwind - surfing net to interacting in social networking sites ,listening to soulful bhajans etc.
Surprised that a simple conversation could bring up so many ideas, I rushed to my friend to give him my feedback. I said “ “I managed around twenty five”. “WOW, That’s great, ”which one is your style”? “Oh I replied, “They all seem so simple and easy and the next time I am worked up for some reason, I am going to try atleast some of these, I am sure they will work out for me too”. He smiled “Now that the cat is out of the bag, let me confess Dear, but that was precisely why I made you talk to your dear and near ones”. These days, you are so stressed out that you have even forgotten to smile” That was for you”. I sat there stunned and until realization dawned on me that the entire exercise was for my benefit. “ Very practical training indeed!! – Thanks, I do appreciate it – I admitted with a sheepish smile , albeit grudgingly”.
Recently, a dear of friend of mine, who conducts corporate training sessions on "Happiness at work", Stress Management, Conflict Resolution" etc called me to find out how i was. "Long time, not even a text message from you"? He asked. "Been too busy, I suppose", I blurted out. "Listen, he said, Do me a favour? I have an assignment for you and I need the information real quick. The assignment was to find out from about 100 people how they relaxed and the deadline was “Yesterday”. Soon, I started ringing up my friends, relatives and even acquaintances. Some of them were surprised, but when I said it was for a cause, they joined enthusiastically. First was my friend “Micheal, who said ”Me, I have a set of photos, mainly of my family and child and Mount Mary which are very close to my heart. Whenever I am tense or worked up, I take out this small album, which I always carry and spend around 5 minutes reminiscing. I definitely feel better”:. “That’s nice n simple” I thought. The next friend said “You know, I used to get flustered very easily earlier”. Now a days, When I get upset about something in the office, I take a deep breath, go to the wash room, wash my face and freshen my lipstick.” I feel better”. The answers ranged from punching a boxing bag , listening to music, go for a long walk , gymming, read a romantic novel, listen to old hindi songs, give in to craving and eat a large pastry, singing, playing a musical instrument, cooking a complicated dish, like Puran Poli, Call up an old friend and talk for some time, cuddling a baby – the positive vibes are instant” – I was told. My niece, a vivacious teen said- “ I cry my heart out” – But I do feel better”. My nephew, not to be left out, said “ When I am upset about bad marks, I go and play for a while with my friends – after that I don’t feel so bad. The list was endless, Surprisingly , most of them had their own way to unwind - surfing net to interacting in social networking sites ,listening to soulful bhajans etc.
Surprised that a simple conversation could bring up so many ideas, I rushed to my friend to give him my feedback. I said “ “I managed around twenty five”. “WOW, That’s great, ”which one is your style”? “Oh I replied, “They all seem so simple and easy and the next time I am worked up for some reason, I am going to try atleast some of these, I am sure they will work out for me too”. He smiled “Now that the cat is out of the bag, let me confess Dear, but that was precisely why I made you talk to your dear and near ones”. These days, you are so stressed out that you have even forgotten to smile” That was for you”. I sat there stunned and until realization dawned on me that the entire exercise was for my benefit. “ Very practical training indeed!! – Thanks, I do appreciate it – I admitted with a sheepish smile , albeit grudgingly”.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
The humble Jack Fruit
Jack Fruit or “Chakka” as we lovingly call in our home town in Kerala has always been my favourite. I remember staring wondrously at those big thorny fruits hugging the sturdy stem of the tree and many hanging precariously from the branches. The rope like stalks held them tightly, lest they would fall from the tree. My grandfather would inspect it every morning and call out to my granny, “moothathedukkatte??” (Shall I pluck the ripe ones?”) My granny would shout back” lets wait till appu , naanu and shanty (my dad, uncle and aunt)come”. They will be here by Vishu”. Vishu always coincided with my birthday on April 14th. Vishu is the ist day of the Malayalam month “Medam” signaling the advent of malayalam new year.We were woken up at 4 am, elders closing our eyes and leading us to the Pooja room to see the “Vishu kani” where amidst the offerings of traditional vegetables and fruits, Lord Krishna’, our presiding deity stood, beautifully decorated . And always occupying the pride of place was the humble jack fruit, its heady fragrance making our mouths water.
My brother, sister , cousins and I would wait till around lunch time when my grandfather would take out the huge jack fruit from the kani and take it to the back yard to be cut. My granny would be ready, handing us a bottle of oil to be rubbed in the hands so that the sap and the juice do not stick to our hands. The overwhelming fragrance of the ripe fruit deliciously assaulting our senses, we would eagerly wait for our turn when our grandfather would give each of us a huge slice, each containing at least 10 to 12 delicious “Chulas”.
And during our fortnightly stay with our grandparents, my grandmother would make various delicacies of jack fruit - jackfruit curry, jackfruit pradhaman, elayada and the most delicious “Chakkavarattiyathu”. This is a jam made out of Jack fruit, Gud and pure desi ghee which remains unspoilt for even A YEAR. This we all carried back to Mumbai as a treat. I know for a fact that I can never get enough of “Chakka”. Jack Fruit in all its forms is just irresistible.
Today, Our grand Parents are no more. My brother, sister and I are all married and settled in Mumbai. We try to make it to Kerala at least once a year, where our Parents have shifted. The family house remains the same with jackfruits, mangoes, coconuts and plantains growing in abundance. My mother has silently taken the role of our granny and she indulges our kids in all the Jackfruit delicacies. My son has inherited my love for “Chakka” , but my daughter finds the smell “too strong” and runs away.
My love for “Chakka” has only grown over the years, especially during summer when I long to have a few “chulas”. Jack fruit is available at times in Mumbai, especially in predominantly south Indian suburbs, but the joy of selecting just the ripe fruit from the tree, and slicing it the right way and relishing it sitting in the back yard of one’s house………………hm…nothing matches that.!!
Jack Fruit or “Chakka” as we lovingly call in our home town in Kerala has always been my favourite. I remember staring wondrously at those big thorny fruits hugging the sturdy stem of the tree and many hanging precariously from the branches. The rope like stalks held them tightly, lest they would fall from the tree. My grandfather would inspect it every morning and call out to my granny, “moothathedukkatte??” (Shall I pluck the ripe ones?”) My granny would shout back” lets wait till appu , naanu and shanty (my dad, uncle and aunt)come”. They will be here by Vishu”. Vishu always coincided with my birthday on April 14th. Vishu is the ist day of the Malayalam month “Medam” signaling the advent of malayalam new year.We were woken up at 4 am, elders closing our eyes and leading us to the Pooja room to see the “Vishu kani” where amidst the offerings of traditional vegetables and fruits, Lord Krishna’, our presiding deity stood, beautifully decorated . And always occupying the pride of place was the humble jack fruit, its heady fragrance making our mouths water.
My brother, sister , cousins and I would wait till around lunch time when my grandfather would take out the huge jack fruit from the kani and take it to the back yard to be cut. My granny would be ready, handing us a bottle of oil to be rubbed in the hands so that the sap and the juice do not stick to our hands. The overwhelming fragrance of the ripe fruit deliciously assaulting our senses, we would eagerly wait for our turn when our grandfather would give each of us a huge slice, each containing at least 10 to 12 delicious “Chulas”.
And during our fortnightly stay with our grandparents, my grandmother would make various delicacies of jack fruit - jackfruit curry, jackfruit pradhaman, elayada and the most delicious “Chakkavarattiyathu”. This is a jam made out of Jack fruit, Gud and pure desi ghee which remains unspoilt for even A YEAR. This we all carried back to Mumbai as a treat. I know for a fact that I can never get enough of “Chakka”. Jack Fruit in all its forms is just irresistible.
Today, Our grand Parents are no more. My brother, sister and I are all married and settled in Mumbai. We try to make it to Kerala at least once a year, where our Parents have shifted. The family house remains the same with jackfruits, mangoes, coconuts and plantains growing in abundance. My mother has silently taken the role of our granny and she indulges our kids in all the Jackfruit delicacies. My son has inherited my love for “Chakka” , but my daughter finds the smell “too strong” and runs away.
My love for “Chakka” has only grown over the years, especially during summer when I long to have a few “chulas”. Jack fruit is available at times in Mumbai, especially in predominantly south Indian suburbs, but the joy of selecting just the ripe fruit from the tree, and slicing it the right way and relishing it sitting in the back yard of one’s house………………hm…nothing matches that.!!
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